How do you Know a Relationship is Exclusive?
Ever wondered whether you're actually going out with a girl, or just so happen to be on a string of consecutive dates? Is there any way of knowing whether it's ok to hedge your bets and date other women? How do you know if she's not going on any other dates?
I got a move for you. On the fifth date, if it's still unclear and you have an awkward break in conversation where you're groping to find something to say that's not lecherous or borne of misogyny, ask her if it's ok to set you up on a date with her sister. Then you'll know if it's exclusive or not. Of course I jest. Or do I? Seriously, it's a minefield out there.
I can't speak on behalf of women. So for all the ladies reading, this is how you know that a man is waiting for the go-codes on whether you’re exclusive or not.
He's invited you to leave your stuff in his house. Amazingly 36 per cent of Brits have deliberately left something at a date’s house in order to give them an excuse to return. I refer you to a very incisive article in The Independent by Rachel Hosie who has done her research on this one.
He's added you on every available social media channel. He's probably also following you in real life or has paid someone to. He wants to know what's going on, where you are, who you're hanging with. Bless him he's crazy about you. He'll certainly tag you in a few posts.
He's calling you by something other than your name. And I don't mean fraudulently calling you by your sister’s name in the middle of some horizontal jogging. He wants to cement some idiosyncrasies into the relationship to give its own identity. If you like him, you'll inevitably do the same.
He'll get a little weird. Perfectly normal this. He might be winding up to tell you that he's ‘all in’ with you (poker analogy). And when dudes have something bottled up, when they're out of their comfort zone they lose composure. So look for signs of him being tuned out (he's probably rehearsing the big 'are we seeing anyone else' speech in his head), clammy hands, general nervousness.
He’ll ask you round about questions. Like ‘what can I tell people when they ask me about you’. If he’s man enough he’ll come straight out with it. Ladies remember to be nice but ruthless. If you can see it’s an iniquitous relationship, I.E you’re not into him as much as he’s into you, then don’t tag him along.
Founder of this eponymous blog, focusing on men's fashion & lifestyle.